So it’s been a while since I last blogged! What can i say….life has it’s amazing way of working out, although it can be VERY VERY time consuming and at times over whelming! None the less 2016 has had its lows, highs and a lot of space for reflection and growth.
Firstly one of the main area’s I’ve had to work on this year is time management, which I am still perfecting! This has consisted of working, career change, and studying. Juggling different elements of life and trying to do them all well has been a challenge, I can not lie and say I’ve done them all well but I am getting there.
So at this time a lot of us reflect back on the events of the year. Some of us may have set goals and plans for 2017 already or just starting to, others may not be in a great space mentally or physically due to things either within or out of our control. What ever stage you’re at, this post is about ways we can start and end 2017 on a high!
A quote that I came across that really resonated with me was, “The secret of change is to focus all your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.” It’s so true, it’s so easy to keep replaying the past, who hurt you, where you went wrong, and the shoulda, woulda, coulda’s. The fact is, it has happened and going back doesn’t help you move forward. The study of cognitive behaviour is a powerful tool. In short it is a method in therapy that helps the client filter areas of their life in a positive way.
Let me give you an example, we all can admit that negativity effects our thoughts, moods & behaviours. So lets say I have been disappointed and let down a lot in life by those that I trust and due to this I have a lot anger. It becomes a daily lifestyle to focus on those emotions and it can effect the way I build relationships with people, as well as causing trust issues, insecurities and effects the way I perceive life. Where the focus lies is to change my perspective on the negative incidents and challenge my thoughts and see how I can extract the positive parts.So how could I look at this is?(few examples)
- I could look at what I have achieved, and has this made me more independent?
- To forgive people when they let me down and let go of harboured feelings from the past.
- Being more social and trying to build relationships with people.
So lets look at methods we can use to work on a “better me” in 2017
This can be done in multiple ways;
- Get a small box or jar, you might want to decorate it to make it a bit more special.
- Write as many positive words/phrases you can think of, either on small pieces of card/paper or post stick notes, what ever you have to hand .
- Everyday(preferably the morning to start your day off right) pull out a couple of your words or phrases and say them out loud. If you can look in the mirror and say them to yourself.
- This can also be done with children and is a great way to teach us to speak positively about ourselves & life.
- Another way is to listen/read self help books/ audio motivation speeches/podcasts.
2.Vision Boards/Scrap books
A great way to help you plan your 2017 is to see it! Vision boards are a great way to inspire you and really think about what it is you want to achieve in life, you are creating a space that is bringing to life all those goals and aspirations. You might want to buy a house, feel better about self, work on your fitness, what ever it is, put it in pictures. Although I think it is key to remember this is not a shopping list, but focus on how you want to feel. So if you want to buy the house, what’s the feeling(s) this achievement will bring? That is what makes a vision board come to life.Just remember it is important to put it somewhere you can see it daily and keep those positive thoughts flowing!
3. Goal setting exercises
There are a variety of goal setting exercises out there. But for me I think its important to identify what areas of your life you want to work on first. I find the wheel of life a great way to pin point this. You can score on a scale of 1-10 how you feel about various parts of your life and work on those areas you are less pleased with. If you are already pass this stage SMART targets are another way of goal setting and looking at how specific, measurable, attainable, realistic & timely they are to achieve. Remember, If you fail to plan, you plan to fail! There’s something about taking a thought and putting in on paper that makes it just that bit more real.
Keeping a diary/journal is a great form of therapy, you can use it to get out emotions, process thoughts, keep a record of your progress, and the list goes on. It’s amazing when you look back on the year and see how many things we miss or forget, but this really helps as you can record exactly how you felt and what happened at that specific time. This a great tool for personal professional development, you can also use your phone to record any thoughts throughout the day and copy them down when you get home. I use PPD in my studies and personal life and find it a great way to look at areas I need to work on and where I am doing well, it’s so easy to forget to celebrate our achievements no matter how big or small.
5. Time Management
As many of us know time is precious, and as millennial women our lifestyles have become busier. But it is important to create a space which allows you to work on YOU! Writing goals down and creating a plan is all well and good but an important element of success is being consistent which =timing. Creating a daily, weekly, or monthly schedule helps us stay on track and stops things become over whelming. Its like writing a contract to yourself, once you see it written down you feel compelled to get it ticked off your list. Working on your time management helps you build discipline. So it you haven’t quite mastered this as a skill there’s no better time than now!
Rome was not built in a day,and working on ‘SELF’ is definitively a journey to be embraced. I wish you great success, good health, happiness, peace and greatness for 2017!!